Mommy Dearest

Well, I just can't seem to get it together.  G. is almost 6 weeks - hard to fathom - and I've neither gone for a walk with him on my own, nor been able to run any errands with him.  Today, I'm sitting around in the clothes I slept in, considering leaving the apartment and ultimately, napping intermittently with him all day.  Normally, I at least try to get some sort of rhythm going with the day - out of bed at 10am, music, dancing, reading, face time, nap time for G. and mommy checks her e-mails, then lunch, more face-to-face time, bath, nap, eat, face, crib time, nap, etc...Can't do anything today.  He's sleeping now on my lap as I write.  I have literally 20 thank you notes to send out.  We've been getting almost a package a day for the past 6 weeks.  Our landlord passed away last Friday, and we never sent the thank you card for G's little  outfit she gave us a couple of weeks ago.  To quote Bernie Mac:  "Don't wait to pay your respects, America." Marco lost his cell phone today.  We're both a bit spastic right now.  

But what about all those Super Moms who are out exercising and getting their babies on a consistent schedule?  Or even the ones who manage to shower and brush their teeth once a day?  Why can't I be one of those?  I am dead tired.  Even though G. is now sleeping about 5 hours straight at night, I feel like I will never catch up from the month I spent getting 2 hours a night.  I've got my 6 week post partum check up with Dr. S. on Friday at 10:15am.  That's an ungodly hour at this point.  I actually have anxiety about making this appointment on time.  

Meanwhile, he is the most precious thing in the whole world.  He is gurgling and babbling at stuff in his crib, and yesterday, at me.  He is smiling and tracking objects.  And he holds his head up, and has for a few weeks, like a four month old.  I adore him. He is, of course, brilliant.  I miss him when he sleeps.

Breastfeeding is becoming pretty much habit, but I have not mastered pumping and he has not experienced a bottle yet.  I think this is bad.  I just read last week that you're not supposed to wait much past one month and here we are at almost 6 weeks.  I did manage to pump two ounces last Friday.  Marco said he wouldn't take it when I was out last Saturday.  Out consists of going to Stop N Shop or Trader Joe's, although I did manage to make it to Marshall's last Thursday, after our Babies R Us shoot.  That was like a homecoming...I easily was at Marshall's twice a week the entire time I was off work and waiting for him to be born.

So...when will all my superpowers kick in?  I've got IRAs to deal with  and taxes and correspondence - geez, just returning a few phone calls would feel like an accomplishment.   

And I'm thinking about work again.  Scary proposition.  I have no earthly how we'll handle child care.   How do women do it who don't make six figures?  Child care is like $1500-2000/month.  

Oh, he's awake.  Must stare into his face and coo.  More soon?  I make no promises.